sick as a dog/deciding the future


My whole plan to be a daily blogger and to work on my daily practice failed miserably. I was waylaid by a nasty, nasty cold, and the plan fell by the way-side.
Now I am better, I’ve had my first day back at classes, and I am ready to tackle things today. I even stopped by the pet store and bought a plecostamous for the fish tank, so that it might tackle the algae problem.
Tomorrow we are supposed to choose the stream we wish to enter next year. I have been wavering between two choices since the middle of our first semester. On the surface, I want to take En’tal. It offers most of the courses I seem to want. It seems better tailored to my goals for the future. But if I talk to some of my teachers, they also suggest Renewable (partly because they teach RR). It offers a wholistic approach, more botany, more field experience, and has a bit more flexibility for the future. The more I talk with my teachers, the more I am confused.
I mention this to my roommate, who is a smart witch, and suggests I toss a coin, or request a tarot reading from our other roommate. I’ve sent an email saying such. And the coin toss came back with a tails – En’tal.
While pausing in my ruminations for this post, I went to have supper. I came back with a full water bottle and made a phone call. The full water bottle leaked to half – making my bed quite wet, and some notes quite soggy. This made me think of Froud’s Faeries. They too got wet once, and a friend suggested that the Faeries were trying to tell me something, and that it was probably Mickle & Muckle at work. So this evening, I decided the Faeries were clamouring for attention with the big puddle on the bed. I’ve got to have a little meeting with them.
My roommie also asked, what does your True Heart say? I am not sure. It depends on how deep I go to look at my True Heart. I am influenced by my desire to please, and be near, one of my favourite teachers. I would like to continue learning from him. But is that my True Heart’s Desire? Or is that the superficial?
Would I like the opportunity to try something outside of my comfort zone? If so, that would be RR. Camping, using vehicles and machines, being outside, these are all things that sound enjoyable, but I have little experience in. This makes me think I should go with En’tal, because that is the familiar. Or, the other voice speaks up and says, do something different, go with RR.
The more I type, the more I can convince myself of one way or the other. My True Heart’s Desire is to take both, but I won’t have the money for both.
Well, I shall sleep on it. Or rather, talk to the Faeries first, then sleep on it.
Deciding one’s future is a troublesome business.